5/12: We've Only Just Begun

This month brought change, endings, reunions—and a return to one of my favorite things.

A couple months ago, my husband and I planned a weekend trip to Denver to celebrate his birthday over the second weekend in May. It felt momentous to even be making plans as it would be our first plane ride in 15 months, and we would both be fully vaccinated for two weeks by then.

Around a week before the trip, we got word that my aunt Bobbi, who lives in Denver, had been in the hospital. She had been diagnosed with cancer a few years ago and had been doing relatively well, but it was now clear that the end was now close, and she chose home hospice in lieu of more treatments. We got to see her when we were in Denver and speak with her for the last time, and she passed away less than a week later.

I went back for her service the following weekend. It was a sad occasion for a family reunion, but it was good to see people, including my parents, whom I hadn’t seen in a year and a half. Our family is relatively small and we’re scattered across the country, so get-togethers always take some doing.

Bobbi was a formidable woman who raised two daughters and was married to my dad’s brother, Darryl, before he passed away in 2011. As others spoke about at her memorial, she was stubborn, funny, and one of the strongest people we knew. (You’d have to be strong and good-humored to deal with our family, and there’s a ton of truth behind that joke.)

The back-to-back trips to Denver had me in airports, rental cars, and hotels, and it felt good to travel again. I’m one of those weirdos who really loves airports, and people-watching is a favorite pastime of mine, so having the experience of traveling by plane again felt restorative.

I have nothing but good memories of my aunt Bobbi, and now I’ll always associate her with the feeling of rebirth and renewal whenever I’m in an airport. It’s important to remember people who have passed, and making small associations like this in our daily lives is a great way to do that.

In other news, I’m coming up on my year anniversary at work next month, and it’s been a ride. The drawback I’m finding is that work is taking everything I’ve got creatively, and it’s hard to want to spend more hours in front of a screen than is necessary for work. Personal writing projects are taking a backseat to work projects that involve a lot of mental bandwidth, and it’s hard to not feel resentful about it, but I’m also very grateful to have my job and to work with great people.

TL;DR 2021 is almost halfway over, and it’s been a mixed bag.

I’m excited for things coming up in the latter half of the year, and anticipation for travel is keeping me going day to day. Austin is functionally 100%-open at this point, and I’m starting to meet up with friends IRL again, which has been great for my psyche.

It really is little things like meeting a friend for coffee that make a big difference in my life. I don’t always need to get on a plane to arrive at a different mental space.

But is sure is fun to fly.

And I know I like to do these silly little italicized addendums at the bottom of blog posts, and damned if I won’t just do it again because I can: the title for this post is a reference to the Carpenters song that played at Bobbi’s viewing. I love that song, and I love even more that I’ll always think of Bobbi when I hear it.